Do Not Stand In Your Own Way

Have you ever convinced yourself that if your weight were to fluctuate, it would only be temporary? 

Have you ever self-sabotaged your success because you were scared that those amazing changes would not last forever? 

Have you ever feared that if your weight changed you would change as a person, driving your family and friends to think differently about you? 

Have you ever convinced yourself that there is no point in losing weight because you are petrified to gain it all back again?

Self-sabotage happens when instead of conquering an uncomfortable situation you let it control you. 

When we feel out of control, we react by creating a situation we can control – one that reaffirms that we are correct. Instead of remaining committed to reaching our original goals, we self-destruct screaming, “See, I told you I would gain those ten pounds back again!”

This causes you to feel anxious and defeated, fueling your inability to experience high self-esteem. 

It is unfortunate how many people cannot take a compliment because they are scared of having a big ego, think they do not deserve a compliment, or worse, they are scared of what the person may have thought of them before. 

If someone says “Have you lost weight? You look awesome!” and you hear “Have you lost weight? Wow, you must have been really fat before!” that is a major problem.

Instead of forfeiting your success to the extinction burst, create action steps that eliminate this and that move you towards health. 

Do what works! 

These action steps are clearly outlined in Life By Design – your guide to living an extraordinary life. 

Your body has basic requirements for life to be expressed fully. You are designed to eat, move, think and be powered in a way that is congruent with your genetic design. If something is defined as healthy it moves you towards health, not away, and is good for everyone and good forever. 

I invite you to ask yourself why you are scared of succeeding. 

If you have gained health, why are you fearful of gaining weight? Ask yourself at what point in your life were you the healthiest? Was it when you had healthy skin, hair and nails, impeccable digestion and regular bowel movements, energy and focus throughout the day, restorative sleep, and a strong body that was capable of quickly recovering from injuries, illnesses and stress? Or, was it when you had none of this, but were skinny.

Please understand that your journey will have its ups and downs – weight losses and gains. But when you start meeting all of your requirements and start living By Design, you have automatically started moving towards health, not away from it.

And please understand that the number on the scale does not determine your self-worth. If you lose those extra ten pounds, will that make you a more patient mother, a more loving wife, a more productive employee, a more supportive friend, or a stronger athlete?

You cannot blank out on what your body requires to be healthy. What you can do is accept that there is clear evidence to support the Life By Design recommendations, and action it in your life. Reality is the final arbiter. 

You’re doing it or You’re not

 I HATE the 80/20 rule. Not quite as much as the line “Everything in moderation” but its getting close.

I need to make a clarification here.. I don’t hate how it is presented in the Eat By Design seminars. It’s a great way to ease into Eating By Design and making a transition away from habits that are not By Design.

There are clear benefits to being on track 80% of the time and if you have off tracks once in a while, being okay with it.

The problem is that many people interpret the 80/20 rule to mean that they should be aiming for 80%.

This interpretation of the 80/20 rule, in my opinion, is what keeps Eating By Design from being a lifestyle for most people.

If you have a friend who is vegan, that’s probably how you refer to them: He IS vegan. Not he eats vegan. It is his lifestyle. He’s not 80% vegan.

You would think it was ridiculous if someone told you they are vegan accept on Sundays or vegan except they eat hotdogs.

When a person is vegan, they draw the line. No meat, eggs or dairy. Period. Ever.

Do you know what must be AWESOME about being vegan? People don’t try to pressure you to “treat yourself” and eat some meat. People get that it is your lifestyle.

I have cousins who are vegetarian and my grandparents always make sure there is a vegetarian option. But when I come over, my family still tries to get me to eat pasta and bread rolls because I should "just lay off my diet" when I’m around the family.

Seriously. It makes me want to blow my brains out.

I can’t be upset with them though, I am the one that encouraged this. When I first started eating By Design I would still have off track food sometimes, mostly on holidays or special occasions. I rationalized it as part of my 20%.

In the last year, my parents and siblings have (finally!) accepted that I really just DON’T eat food that isn’t By Design. They are slowly starting to get it. But that shift has only occurred because I have been 100% when I am around them. And in the rest of my life, I’m pretty darn close to 100%.

We CANNOT Eat By Design only 80% of the time and then be confused when people don’t get it and think we are on a diet.

Its not them … its us.

If we want people to treat us like we have a certain lifestyle, we should be living it.

There are a few foods that I have accepted as part of my Life By Design that are not strictly By Design. I drink coffee. I drink it everyday and I love it. It is part of my lifestyle. Period. Not negotiable. I eat dark chocolate from time to time.. probably about once every 2 weeks. Very occasionally I eat dessert but never one that has flour or other grains. I also very occasionally eat French fries.

My lifestyle.

These are my rules. I have drawn the lines. I avoid grains (especially wheat) and legumes at all costs. I’ve read way too much science about grains & legumes to think of them as anything other than pure poison. I’m probably more turned off by bread than most vegans are by bacon.

So this is my life… And you know what? It’s SO much easier this way then when I was playing the 80/20 game.

When something is an automatic "no", there is no will power involved.

Planning to be off track 20% of the time is so much effort.

You have to think about it all the time. 

If you let yourself eat cookies sometimes but not all the time, then you have to make that decision every time there are cookies available. Weigh the pro’s and con’s. Review what else you’ve eaten recently. Have you had enough other food today to make this only count for 20%?... Its psychological warfare!

Not to mention, the kinds of foods that make up the 20% are sugar dense, nutrient-poor foods designed by food scientists to make you crave them. They are void of nutrition or satiety factors, so there is nothing to tell your brain to stop eating them.

Off track foods wreak havoc on your pleasure, reward, and emotion circuitry, creating a habit cycle that is really hard to break.

These foods also mess with your hormones like insulin and leptin, creating metabolic imbalances that further promote cravings and hunger.

So even a small off track item can really set you back A LOT in your health, performance, self esteem and in your efforts to reach any sort of body composition goals.

I know this is tough love, but think about how counter productive it is to give yourself an excuse and to say that it’s okay to eat foods that bring you away from health and closer to sickness and disease – as long as its only 20% of the time.

You are either eating By Design or you’re not. You are either moving closer to good health or away from it.

I encourage you to draw your lines. Decide exactly what your lifestyle will look like and then DO IT all out.

Don’t just Eat By Design, Be By Design.

What do you really want?

Last week I left you with the question: Should we always honor our cravings?

A part of our Eat By Design philosophy is to listen to your body in order to give it what it needs. 

So what role do cravings play?

Author Geneen Roth makes a clear distinction between cravings of the mind and cravings of the body.

Your body always wants foods that will sustain it, energize it and allow it to function at its best. Your body wants foods that are real, By Design foods.

Your mind, on the other hand, may interpret cravings differently.

Let’s use the example of craving something sweet.

When I say, “Think of something sweet.” 

What comes to mind?

I bet it was something in the realm of candy, ice cream, chocolate or baked goods. 

Change that statement to, “Think of something sweet that you can find growing in nature.”

Now what comes to mind?

Things that grow in nature that are sweet include fruit, sweet potatoes and squash.

Nature’s sweets from the earth are always accompanied with water, fiber, antioxidants, vitamins and minerals. Man-made sweets are almost NEVER accompanied with these things.

When your body is craving sweet it is looking for nutrients.

Your body is the ‘voice’ that you should be listening to. Not the voice in your mind that is maniacally screaming, “CHOCOLATE CAKE!”

Eating chocolate cake will not actually satisfy your body’s craving.  There are no nutrients or physiological benefits that come from baked goods.  Instead of feeling good, more alive and more energetic, when you eat processed sweets, your body feels tired, lethargic, unfocused and damaged.

Eating unnatural sweets also lands you a seat on the sugar train that never stops: Quick sugar high, quick energy crash, hormone fluctuations and then bigger, stronger cravings.  

Another big problem is that you stop trusting your body when you’re on the sugar train.
Many people who try to change their habits and eat healthier get into a mental battle against their cravings and start saying things like “my body hates me, all it wants is ice cream all the time.”

These negative thoughts about your body are destructive to your self-esteem.

Your body doesn’t hate you.

Your body doesn’t even want ice cream.  

When you learn to turn off the voice in your mind that was conditioned to tell you that desserts are comfort and love and satisfaction, you will realize that the ONLY foods your body really wants are the ones that bring you closer to health.

Your body is smart.

Your body is perfect.

Your body will tell you exactly what it needs.

You just have to learn to actually listen to your BODY.

When you learn to interpret your cravings to mean natural, real, By Design foods… You should give into your cravings.

Satisfying your body’s true cravings is part of living an extraordinary life. 

Cravings. To trust or not to trust? That is the question.

Have you ever found yourself going through food phases?  I totally do.

Sometimes it happens with the seasons -- Like how every fall all I want to eat is apples, pumpkin and squash. Often together and always with butter. And cinnamon. And bacon.

At other times I'll go through a month or 6 weeks of being really into a certain dish or type of food. 

Last winter I made cabbage and sausage on food prep day every week for at least 8 solid weeks. I’m not kidding – I ate that stuff everyday.

The last few weeks it’s been Asian food.

I’ve had cravings for Korean (pork bone soup and kimchi) and Japanese (sashimi with wasabi and coconut aminos) and Thai (coconut curries).

My biggest fixation has been a Vietnamese soup called Pho. If you are familiar with Pho, you know that it is usually made with rice noodles. I “By Design” this meal by skipping the noodles and loading up on the bean sprouts. 

I’ve made the spiced-up bone broth for Pho three times in the last eight days and demolished it all with heaps of bean sprouts, cilantro, basil, sliced chili’s, green onions and slices of raw beef.

It might be time for an intervention.

A cornerstone of eating By Design is to listen to your body. 

I’m listening. And all I’m hearing is “why is the broth gone?”

So what does this craving mean? Does it even matter? I think it does. 

When you are having cravings, it’s a good exercise to think about what you’re craving and why you’re craving it. 

Is your body trying to tell you something? Is the craving actually coming from your body or is it all in your head? Can you tell the difference?

What does the food you’re craving represent to you? Is it energy? Is it nutrients? Is it comfort?

After several days of this relentless Pho craze, I got out my journal and started asking myself these questions.

Here is what I came up with:

How do I feel when I am eating it?

Awesome. Pho tastes great. I love soup. Soup is comforting and satisfying, I thoroughly enjoy eating it.

What does my body get out of eating it?

Bone broth is very nutrient dense. It has collagen and a variety of minerals. The beef and veggies in the soup also contribute vitamins, minerals, fats and protein.

How do I feel after I eat it?

I feel great. My energy levels are high throughout the day and I don’t feel hungry again for hours after I eat a big bowl. I can focus and concentrate on my work.

Emotionally, I feel good about the decision.  I feel like I am doing my body a favour and it is a rewarding and positive experience.

When did these cravings start & what were the conditions?

This phase of cravings began very shortly after I moved into a new house. My new place has no air conditioning and I moved in right before that intense heat wave in July. I was sweating more than normal and loosing lots of fluids and minerals.

Ah – ha… Maybe my body is smart. Maybe it has been craving salty (mineral rich) foods and liquids as an appropriate response to the sweaty conditions.

Final Verdict: Good craving, keep satisfying it.

But what if those weren’t the conditions? Or what if the craving was ice cream & donuts instead of bone broth and bok choy?

Should we always honor our cravings?

Think about this question over the course of the week. Next Wednesday, I will give you my answer.

Also, if you want my wicked pho recipe.. Comment or ask me on facebook and I will send it your way.